Stop Waiting: Why Job Promises Aren't a Career Strategy

Honestly; waiting for someone to hand you a job sounds amazing but it’s just not something you can hang your hat on. It could be a friend, former colleague, or family connection that pulls you aside with that knowing look.

"I've got you," they say. "We're hiring soon. Just give me a few weeks to work things out on my end, and I'll get you in."

Weeks become months. The texts keep coming. And so does your anxiety.

Meanwhile, all that time waiting has let other opportunities slip through the cracks while you waited for that door to open.

Here’s the uncomfortable truth, waiting for someone, even a well-meaning someone, is one of the riskiest things you can do. And, if you are doing it right now? Stop.

The Problem with Promises

When someone promises to help you land a job, they usually have good intentions. They might truly want to help, and they might even have some influence. But between their promise and your employment lies a minefield of variables they don't control.

Hiring freezes happen. Budgets get cut. Priorities shift. The person who promised to champion you might lose political capital, change roles, or simply discover they have less sway than they thought. None of this reflects on you, but all of it affects you.

The real issue isn't that people make promises they can't keep - it's that you're building your career strategy around something fundamentally outside your control.

The Opportunity Cost is Brutal

Every week you spending waiting is a week you’re not applying. A week you’re not building new skills. A week you’re not expanding your network by one person. A week you’re not gaining interview experience or gaining momentum.

The job market moves quick. Quicker than you think.

That role you glanced at last month. Filled. The company you thought about reaching out to? They just closed applications. When you finally realize the promised job isn't materializing, you're starting from scratch - You’re starting over from behind.

The Power Dynamics Get Weird

There's another layer here that nobody talks about: waiting for someone's professional favor creates an uncomfortable dependency. You start to feel like you owe them, even though nothing has happened yet. You might hesitate to follow up too much (are you being annoying?) or too little (will they forget about you?).

A Story from the ECNY Vault

One of my clients had this blow up in her face. Her friend

worked at a company that was hiring. My qualified, exhausted, running out of runway client asked for a referral. The friend said yes.

The referral went through. Interviews got scheduled. Then things got weird. Interviews felt awkward. Feedback took forever. When the offer didn't come, the silence felt worse than any rejection email.

Here's what nobody tells you: The friend who referred her felt embarrassed like their professional judgment had been publicly questioned. My client felt exposed and replaying every interaction wondering if she'd screwed it up. They still texted, still liked each other's posts, but the ease was gone. The friendship didn't explode. It just got smaller. More careful. More transactional.

What broke it wasn't anger or betrayal. It was simpler than that. One favor request changed the entire dynamic, and neither could figure out how to get back to what they had before.

Don't bet your entire job search on one person's ability to deliver. If it doesn't work out, you don't just lose the opportunity, you might lose the relationship too.

If the job does eventually come through, you might enter it already feeling indebted

rather than empowered. And if it doesn't work out? That relationship may be damaged beyond repair.

What to Do Instead

The answer isn't to ignore help or connections - networking absolutely matters. But treat every lead, even the most promising one, as just one possibility in a portfolio of options.

Keep applying. Keep networking. Keep improving your skills. If someone offers to help, thank them genuinely and ask specific questions: What's the timeline? Who else should you connect with? Can they introduce you to the hiring manager? Then incorporate their help into your broader strategy rather than making it your entire strategy. Think of it this way: if someone offers you a ride, you don't sell your car. You appreciate the offer, but you maintain your own transportation.

The Exception That Proves the Rule

Is there ever a time to wait? Maybe if you have a formal offer letter in hand, or if you're talking about a highly specific, time-bound opportunity (like a project with a definite start date) where waiting a few weeks makes sense. But even then, keep your options open until something is official.

Your Career Belongs to You

The most successful job searches share one quality: the person running them took full ownership. They didn't wait for permission, a perfect connection, or ideal timing. They created opportunities rather than waiting for them to appear.

This doesn't mean going it alone or rejecting help. It means understanding that no one else will care about your career as much as you do. No one else will lie awake at night thinking about your professional future. No one else has as much invested in your success.

So, by all means, leverage your connections. Accept help when it's offered. But never, ever pause your own efforts while you wait for someone else to come through. Your career is too important to place in anyone else's hands - even someone who promises you the world.

The best strategy is the one where you're always moving forward, creating multiple paths

to success, and treating every connection as a potential opportunity rather than a guaranteed outcome. As we say here at ECNY, “Activity Breeds Opportunity®". Because at the end of the day, the only person you can truly count on to keep you moving and to get you a job is you.

Let’s Be Real

Job searching is already exhausting. The ghosting. The automated rejections. The constant hustle of putting yourself out there over and over again. So when someone says "I've got you" - of course you want to believe it. Of course you want to stop running on the treadmill for five minutes.

That's human. That's normal. That's not weakness.

But this market doesn't wait for anyone. And neither should you.⚡️